Stay-at-home mom Sarah is trying to teach four-year-old Andy the alphabet. The only problem? He doesn’t wanna learn!
Sarah: “Okay, sweetie, you hold the pencil like this, see?”
Andy: “Like dis?”
Sarah: “No, try again…”
Andy: “Like DIS?” (Andy holds the pencil like a thumbless gorilla).
Sarah: “Well, that’s better. Now, look at this workbook mommy got you! Let’s try the alphabet, okay? What letter is this?”
Andy: “I dunno.”
Sarah: “Think hard, Andy, you know this one.”
Andy: “I don’t wanna.”
Sarah: “Look closely, I know you can do it.”
Andy: “Um….. F?”
Sarah: “This is the letter ‘A’, Andy. It’s the first letter of the alphabet. Remember the song?”
Andy: (starts humming)
Sarah: “That’s ‘Old Macdonald.’ I meant the alphabet song; it goes “A, B, C, D,…..’ Right?”
Andy: “I guess.”
Sarah: “Now, try and trace the letter A. Up, down, and across, see? It’s easy!”
Andy places the pencil tip on the paper, then carefully slashes an enormous, Rorschach scribble across the page.
Sarah: “A little smaller next time, but that was a good try.”
Andy: “Dis is BORING.”
Sarah: “Sweetie, you need to know the alphabet, it’s important. Try this one – what letter is this?”
Andy: “Dubba-you?”
Sarah: “This is the letter ‘C’, as in “‘you’re driving mama crazy. ‘ ”
Andy: “Hee hee.”
Sarah: “Come on, Andy, focus!”
Andy: “I don’t wanna do dis! I don’t wanna go to school!”
Sarah: “Well, you’ve got to. Besides, you’ll make lots of new friends!”
Andy: “I don’t want fwends.”
Sarah: (Sigh). “Okay, let’s try one more letter. What’s this one?”
Andy frowns at the page, wrinkling his little brow.
Andy: “O”.
Sarah: “Yes, that’s right! Good job, sweetie!”
Andy: “NOW can I go?”
I debate whether to push Andy a little further, or to cut my losses and end on a good note.
Sarah: “Sure, we’ll work on this tomorrow.”
Andy: “YAAAYYY!”
Andy skips out of his chair and down the hall. I breathe a sigh of relief, grateful that my patience didn’t snap like a rubber band. As I’ve found out: there’s a fine line between trying to teach and torture!
