Patterson Family Letters

Mike's Letter, October 2004

Welcome readers! What shall I report this month? Deanna's working hard at incubating our newest offspring. We're still pondering names. My Dad's given up on "Kumquat Patterson" and started recommending that we call the baby Quark. A Quark can be a fundamental matter particle, a cheese product, or a Ferengi bartender from Star Trek. I keep telling Dad that we don't want our child to be mercilessly teased in preschool, but he thinks that Quark Lepidoptera Patterson would be a marvelous name. I'm glad that Mom had the upper hand when it came to naming us. Come to think of it, she decided before we were conceived! Now that's planning.

Dee's just trying to stay comfortable at this point, a goal which is facilitated by good movies and time on the couch with every pillow in the house, one of which is me. I've been doing my best to keep the place clean and all of us fed. Merrie helps in her own way, playing with sponges and things like that. Gotta teach em while they're young!

You haven't had an update on Weed and Carleen in a while - they're doing well and are still inseparable. There's a pronounced joie de vivre in Weed's work lately, which is unusual for someone who used to be the classic tortured artist. Now he's charming like Avedon with all the talent of Karsh.

Of course, he still does a mean impression of Dali, whom he plans to dress up as for All Hallows Eve. All he needs is a plausible moustache. Weed's always been a bit surreal, which a lot of women find confusing. Apparently not Carleen though - she's an art-school weirdo herself and when I called her "Gala" she knew I meant Dali's wife and not some kind of apple. It's nice that Weed found someone thoughtful and eccentric like himself. They're like a set of weird bookends that you'd find in a junk shop: unusual, solid, well crafted, opposite but identical, supportive of one another - and everyone in between. How's that for groaner's prose!

Despite Dee's mother's alarm, we do know this apartment has limited space for a new baby. The good news is, the upstairs tenants' lease has almost expired and the rumor is they're buying a condo. These people are in their 40's and both work for the stock exchange. Quiet and with no kids, we rarely see them. We know they like classical music and one of them plays the violin. We've said the usual pleasant "hellos" in passing, but have never had a conversation, never found anything out about each other. It's strange, actually. Perhaps they fear we'll pry info from them about how and with whom to invest. If they could see our investment portfolio, they'd know it holds little more than dust! Anyway, their space includes the attic. It's the reverse of Weed's place and would do quite nicely. We're just waiting to see what they're planning and our wonderful landlady's ready to help us move up in the world as soon as possible!

Work keeps me busy, Dee's mother makes me mad. Meredith drives me crazy, but I love her more than I can say. Being a parent is no easy task - it's a career! When it gets really stressful I just think about the character I'm building and all the life experiences I'm banking for future use in a book. I'll write the Great Canadian Novel someday. I'll probably have to forsake city life in favor of spending a year in a cabin on the edge of a pond. No wait, that's Liz. And Walden. Nuts...back to the drawing board.

Talk to you in a month or so!