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Hi there folks - thanks for all your submissions over the last few days. We've had more comments than usual lately, and we'll do our best to post them all - or as many as we reasonably can. Keep your responses coming, and if you don't see yours on the site right away, please don't take offense! We know you all want to be heard, and we read every letter even if they don't all get posted.
Happy Friday!

Steph, FBorFW website developer

Elly, if you had not thrown something at John, then my computer screen would be broken right now - because I would have!!! Ugh!!

Lynn, can you please show the disbelievers in the audience that there is love between Anthony & Liz? I'm tired of the complaining. You must be, too.

Now let's get this party started!! Summer is here!!

Jenn M, Bellingham MA

To Lynn and your staff,

Don't let anyone bring you done about the summer wedding or Liz not visiting Jim enough, or any of the other not so happy comments made here. People need to stop and remind themselves, that this is a comic strip, and not real life.
You and your staff and doing a wonderful job. Thank you for taking the time to reach out to each of us with your art!

Sandy S., Hudson NH

Where was Anthony when Liz
decided on a summer wedding?!?

Holly H-B, Seattle

I agree that alot of people are taking this too seriously,I follow the strip everyday it is like a daily soap opera it's just for fun. I want to see Liz get married and I want to see what happens to Grandpa. I can't beleive that there are some people who wanted Tris to leave Jim after he got sick is that the way marriage works these days? I love thestrip and wish it would continue for a very long time instead of time freezing.

Kathy D, Virginia

I can see how everything is starting to wrap up. Mike & Weed are both successful in their careers and settling down. Elly and John are settling into their retirements. And Lizardbreath is getting together with her high school sweetheart. And of course the wedding would have to take place over the summer before Lynn retires. Im sure April will go on to be a veternarian and/or musician.

So all the major loose ends are coming together nicely. And it really doesnt feel rushed (ok, maybe a little. But after almost 30 years, its weird to see it all wind down).

And I really doubt that Jim wont make it to the wedding. In fact, I wouldnt be surprised if the final panel is of the complete family (including all the characters, even those that have passed) in a 1 panel wedding photo on a sunday.

And in the end, Mike's family will be pretty much at the same point where Elly and John were when the comic started. Just a few years difference.

This is really the only serial comic I have ever followed. Most of them are too dramaish. I will miss FBOFW when its gone.

Douglas S, Florida

Jane from Manhattan-

You crack me up! I love all the Brenda Starr references. However, as I am firmly in the "Elizabeth is not in love with Anthony and Anthony is not a good catch" camp, I do disagree with the assessment that Elizabeth has only 2 options for her life- marry Anthony or take the Brenda Starr route. For one thing, she is a teacher and can't rush off to exotic locales spur of the moment :) Ha ha!

I also love your suggestion that the real reason they were rushing the wedding was because Elizabeth was pregnant! Proof that there is some passion there. But I don't think there is any passion there, just affection.

Again- why can't Elizabeth stay single until she meets a soulmate she is passionate about? All this "take it one day at a time" and "we're taking it slow" talk clearly demonstrates Elizabeth's reluctance to actually be married to Anthony. What do they need time for- to get to know each other better? -to become more mature? -to make sure that they both want to be married?

On a side note- I'm sorry to hear that you don't have any children when you wanted them. Have you considered adoption? My parents adopted my brothers when my mom was almost 50. They always said that having such young kids at their age kept them young. With so many children in need of a loving home, this may be a great solution for all involved!

Michelle, Chicago

Full speed ahead, Lynn! Everyone fasten your seat belts for a wild ride to September!
P.S. Thanks, Lynn, for all the years!

Thom S, Indiana

I have been following For Better or For Worse for as long as I can remember. I have always related best to Elizabeth as she and I are the "same age". Just recently I married the love of my life who was also divorced but with 2 children. Becoming an instant mom is not without it's challenges and there were definately times we spoke about the wedding and our lives without the gushy gushy love stuff. Personally I am THRILLED to see Liz end up with Anthony especially knowing that once again Liz's life and mine are following the same track. I hope they do have the wedding and that Grandpa Jim is able to make it. My own Grandparents were unable to travel to the wedding because of their health and that's the one thing I would have done different. She needs to get married while Grandpa Jim can still be there.

Alice B, Angus ON

Gee, from Liz wanting to take it slow, to a summer wedding would be nice, and Elly telling her that it has to be her decision and that Jim doesn't need to be at a wedding; to telling John that they might be making wedding plans. What happened to letting Liz make her own decision?

She definitely has some deep soul-searching to do based on what the strips have let us see of her relationship with Anthony. These characters depict compressed bits of reality, and I feel there is a responsibility to also show that Liz acted badly by flaunting herself in front of Anthony during his marriage, and Anthony acted badly in the way he emotionally cheated on Therese. I see it as Therese gave in to him to try to save her marriage and ended up paying a huge price for it. At least she was strong enough to get out, even if it did involve an affair. He is a passive aggressive, extremely manipulative person. The entire situation presents an example of dysfunctional relationships, getting married for the wrong reasons, lack of communication between couples, and poor actions and reactions. In reality the relationship is not a good one and should not be held up as an example of a good one to young women.

Marsha, Reno NV

AHHH! This weekend, my 23 year old sister-in-law told me that she really really wants her mother to see her get married before she dies. (her mom has cancer and IS dying)
I swear I wanted to cry and scream at the same time!! No matter how much you love your mother (or anyone) that is NOT why you get married!!
I see her marriage doomed, her son (not the guys) being set up for a world of hurt, and everyone else gearing up for DRAMA.
Then I turn to the comics and face the same situation all over again, although Liz is a LOT more mature and responsible thatn my is-in-law. It's still stupid.
What is the world thinking??
Barking mad.

Christine, E Durham NY

Reading today's comments about Liz and Anthony, "killing off" Grandpa Jim, John being a "jerk", etc. has made me tired. I love the strip, but really Lynn, I don't know how you put up with all this criticism!

Betty M, Virginia Beach VA

I get the paper at the school I sub at, but now that school is out, I don't have access to the paper anymore. Fortunately, on one of the school breaks, I found 'Coffee Talk'. Plus, I can also get my daily Patterson fix as well. (Thank Goodness!) The only thing is, I don't know if I like the strip or 'Coffee Talk' better! What will I do when you retire, Lynn? LOL

Have a great day, everyone!

Tracy B, Denham Springs LA

I am a grief counselor working primarily with geriatrics. My father and mother-in-law are approaching that final stage of life. Your depiction of the impending loss of the Father figure really speaks truth. Please let me know when you get this story line complied into a book, I believe that it will be a great tool to help teach others about the end-of-life journey.

Dave L, Missouri

Much criticism of the Elizabeth-Anthony marriage is based on the assumption that "love" should be present before the fact, and readers do not sense this to be the case.

Our fuzzy Enlish term "love" covers a variety of specific emotions and these are not always clear.

I once suggested to my teen daughter that, if a boy declared he "loved" her, she should ask if he meant eros, philos or agape. In later years she noted she had once done this, and got the response, "I love the way you talk!" Clever lad, but not too clever, I hoped...

Our English "love" can mean sexual lust, as in eros. It can mean a deep interest in or emotional attachment to another person, such as "love" of a sibling, parent or even of an activity (philos), or it can have a spiritual dimension (agape), as in the "love of God."

Sociologists identify different kinds of non-polygamous, stable marriages(as opposed to serial monogamy) in a free society where adults can and do choose:

-the convenience marriage, as in, "We get along ok and live well as an economic team." -

- the common goals or partnership marriage,as in the Hillary and Bill Clinton
marriage

- the sex or passion marriage, as with Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton, although these " grand passion" marriages often result in serial monogamy rather than in lasting committments.

The Therese/Anthony marriage failed for three reasons: they did not share any important common goal, any initial sexual passion dissipated within a year or two, and both were actually inconvenienced in different ways by the marriage itself. None of these attach moral blame to either party.

Often, the real basis of a marriage will change over time. The ethusiastic sex of the early years typically evolving into the deeper feelings of having built a life together in raising children and in long, generally successful mutual experience with money, homes, vacations, relatives and so on by the mid-fifties. This appears to be where Ellie and John are now.

I sense that Liz and Anthony are looking to a marriage of common goals, and these goals are conventional, middle-class things - nice home, steady jobs, shared workloads, having and raising children ( probably the now conventional two) and so on.

Both appear to be tired of living alone, and regular adult human companionship based on mutual trust and affection is an important basis of marriage in itself.

Sexual faithfulness is of course assumed with these two people, as is sex itself, but from the start this marriage, I believe, is not and will not be defined by trying out every position in the Kama Sutra twice a day every day.

I see no reason, personally, to object to such a marriage on such a basis by two adults, both fully employed as professional people (teacher and accountant), both university graduates and both well into their late 'twenties. Both appear sufficiently mature and experienced to have outgrown and left behind the pop culture, tabloid, "Hollywood movie" version of courtship and marriage. Neither is a virgin, either physically or mentally.

In terms of human evolution and the deeply programmed mating strategies of our species, females still tend to choose men they believe will give their mutual children the best chance in life. In our time "Og, themighty hunter" (guaranteed food supply and preferred status in the hunter-gatherer band) is replaced by the "solid job" or "socially prominent" male, but for the same basic female reasons - what's best or most advantageous for our children? Some evidence suggests males still strongly choose healthy looking women, rather taller than shorter, with clear skin and visible ability to both nurse infants and give birth successfully in terms of the pelvic girdle in relation to the big heads
of our species.

Remember, civilization itself is only about ten thousand years old, but our species has been around at the genus level at least three million years or so.

John, Kitchener

I'm not sure where all of the "hate" of Liz being with Anthony is coming from because they have been apart for years. They have had chances to be with other people, live their own lives, and follow their separate dreams. Paul and Liz would not work because Paul wanted to stay where he was and Liz wanted to go back home - you can't be together if you can't be honest about simple things like geography. Anthony saved Liz from being attacked by Howard, and I recall one reader saying it was creepy. Excuse me? He saved her life. First loves rarely get a chance to reconnect, and so many of you want to destroy this story simply because you think it is selfish to be with someone who accepts you the way you are. And of course Liz wants to take it one day at a time, everyone has cheated on her. She is entitled to be a bit hesitant. Being in love doesn't mean you have to have blinders on - it just means that you are trying to move forward.

Marie, Illinois

People have all been commenting on Liz dragging her heels regarding the wedding. How many times have we seen Anthony pushing for a date?
None...in fact we haven't seen much of him at all lately.
Is it possible that they aren't rushing because of Anthony's little girl?
Sure she likes Liz...but maybe she's not ready for a new mommy. Maybe they want to get her used to the idea first.
Who knows....maybe Liz has a case of cold feet.
Her previous relationships haven't been very good.
Her first boyfriend away from home turned out to be a royal jerk.
Warren was never there...and Paul really hurt Liz.
He wanted to stay where he was and not move to the city...but the way he broke it off was cruel.

People have also commented on Michael being a self absorbed lout who only cares about his books and not his kids.
Well....he spends time with his kids.
How often do we see Dee with them...and when we do she's usually complaining about something, or looking totally shell shocked at having to look after two small kids.
Those kids were barely dried off when she was wanting to go back to work.
And those who think Michael is so incompetant...well, who was watching Merrie when she rode her tricycle down a flight of stairs and broke her arm....oh yeah...it was Dee.
As for John saying that he didn't have to do anything about the wedding...well, most men I know feel that way. They leave it to the women to plan and colour co-ordinate, deal with the script for the invitations and all that stuff.
The Pattersons aren't perfect, but all in all they are a good family who really all care for each other and are supportive of one another.

Ann, Ontario

Am I the only one who thinks Anthony is somewhat...creepy? He is so 70's. His mustache just grosses me out, sorry but cant he be drawn more attractively? Does Liz HAVE to marry someone so unattractive? Is this to prove a point? Ugh just give him a makeover already.

Nancy, Washington

As a loyal reader, I must say I may not always agree with the outcome of Lynn's storylines, but as in real life, I'm not always pleased with my situations. When I married my husband Arno on July 1st, 1981, we had only been dating a few months and had a shotgun wedding. I'm sure if my dad had a shotgun, it may have been used. Well, 27 years later we're still together and guess what..... I still like him a lot (maybe because he still has a mullet). As for Elly's dad, my mom is 86. The hardest thing I've had to do, is watch this wonderful, hardworking, vibrant woman of faith, go to being frail and confused a lot. It is not my wish to have her pass on or grow old, but it happens. There are times when I am unable to help her, except to hold her hand while she either cries because she want to do things, or just listen to the same stories I've heard before. Lynn keep up the great stories. We who are in the sandwich generation (myself being mushy peanut butter) salute you for your boldness and honesty.

Laurel, Edmonton

I for one am THRILLED that Liz and Anthony are getting married - the family needs something to take their mind off the parts of life that aren't so enjoyable - everyone needs to remember that even though we love all of them, it is a comic, and we are not going to see every word the characters say...I can't wait!!

Toni S, Shawnee OK

Re: Liz and Anthony. i find it intersting that some believe that because they appar to be boring etc that this is not a good relationship for marriage - that she should find someone more exciting. Did she not do that and fgound the "exciting" guys less than what she thought. Couples often settle into a routine - some would call it boring at times. But if they can live through the boring times and still find each other as a good loving companion then that is a good relationship for marriage. Who said marriage had to be exciting 24hrs/7

Ralph, Toronto

Yahooo!!!

A wonderful summer wedding!! Sounds good to me!

I was also married right before I lost my grandmother. In fact, it was her last family event too. After all these years, I still have a wonderful memory of my wedding, because she was there.

Tara, Vacaville CA

Dear Lynn,

I'm one of many life-long fans.

Here it is: I really wish you wouldn't "freeze" the characters in time. I would rather see repeats of the old strips, or, as was mentioned in the press release, occasional new strips about the Pattersons earlier on in their lives.

I know you have your reasons for making this decision. I have to admit, every day feels like a reprieve from the inevitable, when I see a new strip dealing with the characters in the present. The fact that the Pattersons grew older and changed had, for me, a huge appeal. I will sorely miss that.
With much love and admiration,

Jennifer, Toronto ON

For heaven's sake can it be any more obvious that Liz doesn't *want* to marry Anthony, she's only doing it because she feels that she's supposed to? She does not, I repeat DOES NOT LOVE HIM in a romantic manner.

Newsflash: you're engaged. There's no more "taking it slow."

As my dad used to say: "Either (poop) or get off the pot."

Jenny, Barrie

My friend Eric rushed hus wedding so his dad who was dying could be at the wedding. His dad dted two weeks later. His marriage fell apart five months after that. He was divorced six months later. They rushed into marriage so they could have memories of their loved on being there, but now they don't even want to remember the wedding at all because of the painful divorce. If they hadn't rushed it, they might have been more prepared for the challenges of marriage or they might have seen that they weren't right for each other after all. In Elizabeth's case, I think both are true. She's not ready for the challenges and she's not seeing that she and Anthony have few of the prerequisites to make marriage a long term success.

Jenna

August 30? What's this about August 30?

I think I am in shock! Is this strip ending? Forever???

Yikes!

How am I going to deal without my morning dose of FBorFW???

Well, I guess there is no hope for Elizabeth now. Since the marriage was going to happen no matter what, I wish the wedding took place immediately and more time was put into April. She's the only one left with any kind of a spark. I would have loved to watch her solidify her future.

If this strip really is to end, I thank you, Lynn, for allowing me to watch the family grow; from Mike and Liz as babies, Farley, the surprise "April" gift, etc. I have enjoyed them tremendously and will now keep quiet and not complain anymore about how you are going to allow them to walk into the sunset. You have taken me on a wonderful ride, and I now put myself into your hands to enjoy the finale.

Good luck and best wishes, whatever the future holds.

Laura R, New York

What in the world?? I have been reading FBOFW for years and absolutley love it. I relate to some of the characters, have grown with many, and, as an artist have always marveled in Lynn's ability to draw the human hand. Why, I even had trouble when De was expecting Meri because I had just lost a baby. Here is my .02: It's a comic strip!! Lynn has artistic license to do whatever she wants! There is so much negativity in your feedback! Guess what...your opinion matters, but if you are so concerned then spend your own time going to art school, learning the trade, hiring your own illustrators, getting trademark, creating years of effort in characters, agents, advertising, ETC and THEN YOU CAN CRITIQUE LYNN!! It's her piece of art. Not yours.

Lauren S, Upstate New York

Lynn...thanks for the note today. It's your story and I doubt we'll every really understand the challenge of linking 30 second snippets together, while we reflect on our own experiences and desires in a time slot of our own choosing. Its always easier to be a Monday morning quarterback and judge other peoples lives rather than our own; but at least these "people" are made of ink and newsprint, and not flesh and blood. Thanks for the characters and stories over the years.

Greg, St. Louis

Thanks Lynn, We in our family have loved your strip for ever! Your characters have marched beside us as they grew and I have used you story lines in my class to teach story sequencing, direct speech and to discuss pertinent topics - not a bad record for one strip - I am really going to miss them when you close down!! I can remember having one strip on my pin board for a long time when Elly and I were dealing with little children and the lack of sleep they bring, and I found the series about April and Jeremy very useful as a bullying discussion in class. At this moment my daughter is planning a wedding - in the Australian summer. I expected Liz and Anthony to marry, there were so many hints. I cannot understand all the controversy this has caused for readers. It will be a wonderful way to wrap up Liz's character and bring a well loved story to a fitting close. Perhaps it is really the thought of losing such well loved characters of such long standing that is the real problem. Elly, John and their family have commented so profoundly and matched so well the lives of so many around the world that we in Australia will have withdrawal, let alone folk in Canada and the US.

Kerry G, Adelaide South Australia

Lynn,
I have gone straight to your strip every day for years, and loved each and every wonderful, homey and happy story and even the sadder ones. My dear father had a stroke ten years ago and passed just this last Autumn. I so understand the familys' feelings concerning this storyline, having been there and it's just as you've been writing for years...it's for better or for worse. Having three grown children and gone through so many of the same stuff, it's not hard to relate to your human and touching and sometimes irritatingly crazy bits of family life. Thank you so much for adding a little sparkle to all our days!

Annie, Oregon

I would just like to point out that if Liz really wanted to take things slowly, she probably wouldn't have a ring on her finger... Why bother getting engaged if you're not going to get married in the near-ish future? Anyone who needs a ring on their finger to say "I'm fully committed to this person" should take a bit of a closer look at the relationship they're in. I fully respect both the pro and con sides of the marriage debate(I'd like to get married one day, but not everyone wants that), but the second I get engaged only to wait because we're taking it "too fast" is the second I know that I should be high-tailing it out of there!
I think that we need to have faith in the fact that Liz is making the right choice and that Lynn wouldn't send a beloved Patterson character into a messy divorce situation this late into the strip.

Sarah, Montreal QC

Dear Lynn,

Thank you for taking the time to respond to the myriad comments and responses people leave as they respond to your strip -- it is wonderful to have a dialogical process such as this in place.

I am glad that you have brought the story to a point where, finally, Elizabeth and Anthony are together. The meticulous "timeline" of their relationship provided on the website clearly indicates that this is a deep relationship of an enduring fibre. The careful, sometimes tentative and other times just thoughtful way they approach their relationship is evident in the very first strips showing their interactions in grade school. The strong attraction was always there, but one or the other was so often afraid to name or act upon it or trust it.

As the strip has shown over the years, Anthony has been deeply in love with Elizabeth all his life. And she has always cared for him. At times it seemed almost as if she was hearing the voice of some of the readers saying "relationships between childhood sweethearts can't last"; whether she heard those voices or convinced herself that their bond couldn't survive the separation of distance or whether she just wanted to try new things, over and over Elizabeth seemed to try to talk herself out of her feelings for Anthony, but those feelings never went away, even when she was involved with Eric, Warren and Paul. Each time she would see Anthony through all the years, her feelings would spark and the strong attraction between them would be evident.

As I read your full narrative,it seems clear that this is not at all a case of Elizabeth settling -- it is a case of her finally listening to what her heart has been proclaiming all along. It may not be the drama of "love at first sight", but it certainly is a powerful love-story!

I thank you also for the very natural, realistic way that Elizabeth is using her desire to have Grandpa Jim see her married as a catalyst to move on to the next step. I am a minister, and I can personally attest that in this day and age it is becoming ever more frequent for couples to determine wedding dates/celebrations based on when loved ones are going to be able to be there and be together. (You showed the other side of this, in a sense, when Michael and Deanna has their "first" wedding so that they could escape the interference of family; this wedding of Elizabeth and Anthony looks like it is going to show the positive side of how concerns for family play a role in such an event.) Again, looking back at the "E & A Relationship Timeline" and seeing how Grandpa Jim was witness to the depth of the bond between Elizabeth and Anthony even when they denied it themselves, it is particularly lovely to have her deep caring for her grandfather be the motivation for her and An!
thony to set a date and be married.

Thank you for creating a world that draws so many of us in day after day after day, "30 seconds at a time."

Sincerely,

Ashley S, Rochester NY